2004 Queen City Cruise: LoveMuscle

LoveMuscle makes a big splash

It was, as always, An Unforgivable Naughtycal Adventure on the High Seas. The 2004 Queen City Cruise excursion threatened to be just a bit naughtier than normal as the outrageous gay party celebrated the theme, LoveMuscle.

Queen City Cruise virgins

But the 2004 Cruise featured a high proportion (nearly half according to Tacky Tourist estimates) of "cruise virgins" -- first-time cruisers who quietly enjoyed the stunning, sunny views of the Emerald/Queen City's inland waters. Hosts Bitsy Bates and Marina Dennis were also virgins to the hosting chores, but did a great job keeping the packed crowd entertained, engaged, and just naughty, loud, and outrageous enough to make things interesting.

Seattle's bluest skies

The weather helped – eventually. Cruise Day dawned under cloudy, threatening skies. Unseasonable showers in the usual bone-dry early August had sprinkled the Seattle area on Friday. Things didn't look much better Saturday morning. As volunteer crews unpacked pounds of decorations and sound equipment, the cloudy skies seemed to promise more showers. But as crowds began to form on Argosy's dockside Pier 55 stage for the pre-boarding show, the skies started to clear.

The cloud cover thinned as cruisers boarded the boat through the orange and red LoveMuscle portal. The sun finally broke through the clouds just in time for the departure of the 24th Annual Queen City Cruise, the queer community's contribution Seafair, Seattle's annual water sports extravaganza. By the time the Goodtime II rounded Magnolia Bluff on its quick dash from Elliot Bay to the Ballard Locks and Lake Union, those rare "bluest skies you've ever seen" sparkled above the rain-washed emerald landscape.

A long party tradition

Queen City Cruise: LoveMuscle, was presented by Tacky Tourist Clubs. It enters the hazy memory as part of a long gay party tradition in Seattle. It is a gay loud and outrageous party cruise on Elliott Bay, Ballard Locks and beyond.

Creating a gay cruise party boat

On August 7, 2004 the Argosy ship Goodtime II was transformed as it is every year for the Queen City Cruise.  As has happened each year since 1981, it became the most festively decorated boat in Seattle, with big red lips on the bow, a tiara perched on the brow of the pilot house, nautical flags, and heart banners hanging from the railings, and with pinwheels sparkling in the sunny breeze.

 

The transformation isn't just visual, but also aural as the main deck of the Goodtime II becomes a dance floor for the most exciting tea-dance in Seattle. DJ Carlo Cochran kept the dance floor in motion, spinning dance mixes prepared by Scott Britt. To the dismay of a few waterfront residents of Shilshole Bay but to the delight of many Lake Union boaters, the Goodtime II is also outfitted with external speakers for The Cruise, allowing the boat to give musical greetings to visitors at the Locks, the downtown piers, and in the ship canal.

Becoming a tourist attraction

Ever since its first tour in 1981, the Queen City Cruise has been as much about sight-making as sight-seeing.

The 480 party people aboard the decorated, loud, and very gay Goodtime become a major attraction as the party boat passes through the Ballard Locks.

Dazzling entertainment

The hunks, costumed revelers, and just plain party folks on board always provide the best entertainment, but there is far more.

The preboarding show at Pier 55 was presented by Timberline Spirits and featured some of the northwest's best drag divas. Those who arrived early for the Cruise, along with sometimes surprised guests of neighboring restaurants, and the real tourists waiting for or returning from more sedate Argosy excursions enjoyed inspired performances by Miss Smokee as Cher and Lady Chablis as Aretha. The growing crowd at the dock was kept laughing by another manic performance The Visqueens and by Aleksa Manila; and Ryan McCabe.

Once onboard, cruisers were fortified by an impressive buffet catered by Guppy's and entertained during dance breaks and mermaid sightings by performers from the Timberline's Simply Flawless cabaret: Lady Chablis, Pleasant Dreams, and their friends.

Costume contest and prized package

Valuable prizes were awarded for best costumes in two categories. The judges had little trouble choosing the winners of the "Tackiest Tourist" category since the winning couple simply sported too many mismatched fabric patterns and cheap plastic souvenirs to be ignored. The other costume category, "Most Lovable Muscles", presented more of a challenge. There were more than the usual number of cute near-naked hunks who were gladly (and thankfully) willing to flaunt their hard, firm [umm...] gym bodies. In the end, the award went to a cute young hunk with a winning, welcome-all smile.

Beneficiaries

According to Randy Henson, event coordinator for the Tacky Tourists, the event is expected to raise about $8000.  The money will be shared with the beneficiaries, which include Seattle Metropolitan Elections Committee for Sexual Minorities (SEAMEC), Seattle Quake Rugby Team and the Legal Marriage Alliance of Washington.